Two Ways I Do Not Want To Die

1) Riding the exercise bike

2) With the CPAP mask on my face

The bike because it would mock the folly of pursuing health.

The mask because an unfashionable corpse leaves nothing to the imagination.

Random Quotes

 "Still at heart I know there's more wisdom in sorrow than in joy."

1) "I mean, do you think if you died drunk you'd sober up before you met Jesus? 2) "Good question. I don't know." 1) I thought about that. Standin' in front of him drunk. What would he say. Hell, what would you say?" 2) "I guess I don't think your soul gets drunk."

"It's just that sometimes I think I would have found my life pretty funny if I hadn't had to live it."

From The Passenger, by Cormac McCarthy

Painful Truths

 "Grief is the stuff of life. A life without grief is no life at all. But regret is a prison. Some part of you which you deeply value lies forever impaled at a crossroads you can no longer find and never forget."

"Again, I've encountered no greater mystery in life than myself."

From The Passenger, by Cormac McCarthy

Don't Die Just Yet

You cannot afford to die when you are reading a Cormac McCarthy novel.

It's just too fucking important.

You Need to Know This

I am a 70 year old man working a part time job to make ends meet.

However, I am not without substance.

I aspire to become an aesthete.

Making New Friends

Just met Richard Kuklinski and Gary Tison.

Gary Tison was a dedicated criminal. At one point in his career he was convicted of passing bad checks and sentenced to 7 months in jail. As he was leaving the courthouse he asked to be allowed to kiss his wife. A guard refused.

Tison overwhelmed the guard on the way to prison, killed him, and escaped. He was arrested the next day. 7 months became life in prison. Smart guy. This was in 1968.

Tison's focus became escaping from prison. He tried three times. He successfully (sort of) escaped in 1978 with the help of his three sons. Fred MacMurray would be jealous.

As they were fleeing, Tison, along with Randy Greenawalt - who escaped with him, killed a family, including a baby, in Arizona, and a honeymooning couple in Colorado. They needed transportation.

Johnny Law eventually caught up with them after a couple of weeks. One of Tison's sons was killed, Tison managed to get away but eventually died of dehydration and exposure in the desert. He was 43.

Check out Last Rampage, the movie made about Tison in 2017.

Richard Kuklinski was a hired killer known as The Iceman. He claimed to have killed 100 men. This is what initially attracted me to the movie - The Iceman. Turns out law enforcement believes he killed no more than 15 men. So a guy I considered to be a raging success turns out to be an underachiever.

Still a good movie, though.

After serving 18 years in prison, Kuklinski died of a heart attack at the age of 70. I am 70. I am not dead and I am not in prison. Small blessings.

Anyway, it's a bit horrifying that people like this exist in the world.

Then again, it's kind of interesting.

It's Pretty Fucking Simple

 If someone would just give me $4 million, I would quit fucking whining.