Meaningful Words Deconstructed

 "Am I young enough to believe in revolution?"

Not just revolution. Change. Forward movement. Acquisition of knowledge and wisdom.

"Am I strong enough to get down on my knees and pray?"

To ask for help. To admit to weakness and confusion.

"Am I high enough on the chain of evolution to respect myself, and my brother and my sister?"

Respect myself - so fucking important. And others; indispensable.

"And perfect myself in my own peculiar way."

To work at being the best person you can be, staying true to your own unique soul.

The quoted lyrics are from Pilgrim's Progress, by Kris Kristofferson.

The agonizing and unrequited striving to make those words reality, is my own.

I Compare Myself

to everyone in my life who is right around my age.

I come up short.

A high percentage, a very high percentage, of people my age are fully retired.

I am not.

I know a fair amount of people five or six years younger than me who are retired.

All of these people are living life effortlessly and smiling a lot.

These people, every single one of them, are obviously smarter than I am. Much smarter.

This disturbs me. I used to think I was smart. Until I got past 65.

And the older I get, the stupider I get. Unless I maneuver a way to retire.

Or die.

A Mantra For Survival in 2025

Everything I think, do, and say is completely justified.

Everything.

Every fucking thing.

Justice

 I should be living in New Orleans.

I am not.

I should be living in Austin, Texas.

I am not.

What the ever-loving fuck happened? Who dropped the ball?

"Objection, Your Honor - question asked and answered."

"Objection sustained."

Tick Fucking Tock

 No time for fatigue.

No room for doubt.

Solutions

 Bad day, bad mood.

Considering consuming a violent quantity of whiskey tonight.

Tick Fucking Tock

 It's too late to be afraid.