When Asylums Were in Vogue

Todd stumbled out of his decrepit house, down the rotting stairs, tripped and fell face first into the snow.

He stood with fists clenched at his sides and screamed like the lunatics used to when asylums were in vogue. Then he picked up the gun he dropped and continued across the yard towards his truck.

His next door neighbor, Myrna, walked out onto her deck and called "Hey Todd, what's happening, man?"

Todd whirled and shot her in the face.

Then he started dancing in the snow, a madman's dance, jerking around like a drunken marionette. Shouting "I did it. I finally did it. They can't take it away from me. I got proof. They call me a loser but they're full of shit. I showed 'em today. I won. I'm a winner. A winner!"

Todd turned and headed back towards his house, slipping, sliding, and giggling like a child.

It was a very good day.

WW

 "What whiskey will not cure, there is no cure for."

Irish Proverb

This is an entirely reasonable proverb, spoken by a hearty civilization that has done the homework.

Let's face it - vodka drinkers are pretentious, sipping their cocktails with pinky finger raised. And they are sneaks - smuggling nips into work so they can drink on the job, on the premise the boss will smell nothing on their breath (I know - I've been doing it for decades, even though I'd much prefer to smuggle whiskey).

Tequila drinkers are insane. Tequila is liquid heroin. I love the stuff but I can't drink it because one drink leads to another until I am passed out on the floor with my pants around my ankles.

But whiskey drinkers, well, we are merely pursuing health. A cure for a cold, or the flu, or a bad marriage, or a shit-ass job, or a broken down car.

Yeah, baby - whiskey drinkers got, well, wisdom.