Tomorrow

Carol goes back to work tomorrow.

Part time. 10 to 2 for the rest of the year. I wish with all my heart she never had to work another day in her life.

Of course it had to fucking snow. I shoveled like a motherfucker. I put sand down everywhere I could.

But I am working all goddamn day. I'll be here when she leaves, so I can pull the car around, help her negotiate the fucking snow.

I will NOT be here at 2:30 when she gets home. Son of a fucking bitch.

I told her not to stop and get the mail; just drive in and get in the house safely.

My heart breaks and it breaks and it breaks.

Carol has said more than once that she looks stupid with a droopy face. That she is self conscious about her speech.

If I had any brains at all I would have made a lot more money in life and she wouldn't have to deal with this.

She is sleeping on the couch right now. She gets tired.

I don't know how tomorrow will affect her.

Son of a fucking bitch.