There Are Limits

I'll be making some changes.

Less whining and complaining is a great place to start. That is my promise to you.

I complain a lot. Have you noticed? No? I get it, I am kind of subtle. But I let things get to me and, instead of seeking solutions, I whine. It's a ploy to invite empathy. The good thing is, it's hard to mistake condescension for empathy. So I'm not completely out of control.

So I'm cutting back on money worries. I mean, I still need a boost to my income, and I'll still worry, but there's no reason to whine about it - everybody has money worries. I looked into employment at crematoriums, but that hasn't panned out yet. 603 Cremations looks promising and it's right down the street, so you never know. I am a master interviewee - I can lie with the best of them. I'll find a way to hose piles of money into our account, somehow, someway.

I won't whine about my gut. I've been sick since December 9, still am - haven't exercised once during that period. Usually I work out 5 times a week. Gained a little weight. But, you know, I lost 18 pounds after knee replacement, mostly do to my impressive dedication to post surgery workouts. Right now I only have to lose 4 or 5 pounds, so I will get it done. I'm not ascared. In the meantime, we have pecan pie leftover from Christmas - hot damn!

I won't whine about my Hyundai, even though it doesn't impress anybody, including me. In fact when I drive down the road, street urchins throw oranges at it. I lust after my Lincoln; who knows, maybe I'll be driving one at the end of next year. Could happen.

I won't whine about my landlord. I mean, he's a prick, no doubt. Screwing us royally. I have a voodoo doll of the fucking prick and I am jabbing that thing with sewing needles hoping that he will get sent to prison and lose his entire fortune. But we love it here. Love it. So, either we find a way or we move, and I do not want to move ever again. We will triumph and he will be buying flannel shirts at Goodwill. 

I won't whine about my job. It's pathetic and an embarrassment to me, but it's a mile down the road and easy as hell. No pressure. It brings in enough money to buy a couple of tins of Spam every week, so I guess it's better than nothing. I will score a better paying job and my ego will be stroked, but until then, I'll keep reporting for duty with the rest of the girls, for a grueling two days a week.

I draw the line at winter. I need something to hate. Something to complain about. I fucking hate winter. Always have. This winter already sucks; we've had a lot of cold and enough snow for me to throw several tantrums. And I will continue to do so. Every time it snows I'm going to whine like a bitch, loudly and endlessly. Every time I have to wear 6 layers of clothes to leave the house, I'm going to throw things against the wall, then pick them up.

So cut me some slack, give me some room. I will direct all my anger and hatred and frustrations, all my whining, towards winter. Viciously and consistently. In the meantime, I will honour my promise in my heart, and try to keep it all the year. I will live in the Past, the Present, and the Future. The Spirits of all Three shall strive within me. I will not shut out the lessons that they teach.

Good enough for you?