10 minutes ago.
Last few years she pops up to Salisbury Beach with Paula, Cori, Lorraine, and used to be Ronda. Ronda dropped out last year. For 3 nights 4 days.
Used to be I couldn't wait for her to leave. Used to be she couldn't wait to leave. This year is different.
It is comforting to have Carol around as I endure rehabbing the knee. To talk to, to take care of me, to take comfort in just having her around for support. To worry about me and encourage me.
I got emotional today. So did she.
I got me the Us Open to dig, I got me a Delmonico steak for a special supper, no MSNBC or local WMUR news for 3 and 1/2 days, NFL kicking off, music to listen to loud and whenever I want to.
Same as always.
But this year it is different. I am feeling alone. Already.
I am a different and a better man than before this knee thing happened. I am working hard and proud of my progress. And I am not whining nearly as much as Old Me would have done. This is tough, sometimes painful, and time consuming. And it is transforming me.
But I do have days when I am just too tired, feeling more pain than I'd like to be, when getting up to exercise one more time seems like getting up to climb Mount Everest. And on those days I do blow off steam. And Carol talks me down and encourages me and empathises with me or for me.
I am getting tougher.
But I am not whole without Carol.
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