The Only Sane Thing

It is imperative that I learn to live in the now - NOW!

Nothing but turbulence since 10/31/2023. Ch ch ch changes. The best of which was some fellow named Jackson Joseph Testa. Which actually highlights the point of this rant.

Jackson is coming up on 6 months old. I will have to live to be 90 to see him at 20. Frightening thought. So I have to learn to live in the now. Every moment with him is precious and we definitely treat them that way. We are mesmerized. That is what matters. And when 2044 rolls around we'll see where I am at. If I don't make it, I will not have wasted one precious Jackson moment. That is critical.

But there's more.

My life has been so weird since last October. All over the map, most of it good. But the Knee Situation has tested me AND given me lots of time to think. In a weird way it has been the icing on the cake as far as introspection goes. I have been imprisoned in my home, free to consider my short-comings and obligations. And to gain some perspective.

I got a lot hanging over my head. 

We gotta deal with/worry about the money-grubbing asshole that owns this park. I need a job. I'm swimming upstream towards my true self - 7 decades of self-loathing behavior is tough to turn around. But when it happens - and it is happening - it will happen. Just like that. Carol needs a new car. I want my Lincoln and my Movado.

But, you know, man - we got it pretty good right now. The rest will come. Because I will take care of it.

So why not be happy while happiness is happening so naturally. Just dig it, baby.

I am loosening up. I'm getting better at it. Happiness no longer feels foreign to me. But I got to get to 100%. I cannot waste one second of the happiness I am living. I cannot obsess about the future - it will work out. 

Football season has started. Hockey season is right around the corner. We have new friends. and just reconnected with old friends just last week - who live in Belmont! I got Carol & Emmy Lou & Patsy, Keith & Krista & Jack, Craig & Amanda & Jackson & Murray, Eddie & Carolina, a little $ in the bank. I am fucking happy.

NOW NOW NOW

Gonna gobble it up like there's no tomorrow.

It's the only sane thing to do.