I don't give a damn about any first impression I have ever made in my life up to now.
Every first impression I have made was erroneous. Not one of those people really know who I am.
I am all about making new first impressions. With everyone I know and love.
Starting over. Just like that. It can be done. Change your mind change your life.
I have done nothing but think since July 31. Suffering and time will do that.
And thinking has been kicked into overdrive with Carol on vacation.
Everything I do while home alone is something that nourishes my soul. No distractions, no compromises, no obligations other than to myself. Books, movies, sports, MUSIC - my soul is wide open and drinking in everything I love like a parched derelict stumbling over a wide open fire hose.
I am beating myself up with these fucking knee exercises and kicking ass. More often than not I look forward to them because they are an enormous challenge and I like defeating them. Every time I do I get stronger mentally. I can feel it happening.
Take that dynamic and add to it a soul that is being fed exactly what it wants - exactly what it fucking needs - non-stop every waking hour - and I feel like Superman.
First impressions, baby.
Blow you out of the water.
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