Saturday, August 13, 2011

Demons (in my head)

There are demons in my head. Little troll-like beings, ugly and repulsive, and they are digging around, rooting out original ideas, magical words, piling them all up and setting fire to them. This happens to me from time to time. Maybe I get a little depressed or thrown off course, maybe I become disillusioned with life in general or my life specifically and suddenly there they are. Demons. They want to keep me from succeeding. They work on commission for Beelzebub and like any good salesmen they are quite determined.
Leonard Cohen said "There is a crack in everything, it's how the light gets in." The demons have sealed up the crack in my skull so that at this moment in time there is no light getting in. This is a crack that has been there since Revia dropped me on my head as a wee child, so you can imagine that it is a substantial part of my psyche. They have sealed it before but I always manage to blow it open and I will again. Probably by Monday. I keep candles in my skull for just such an eventuality but the demons snuff those out pretty easily. I miss the sensation of wax dripping into my brain crevices.
I am working today. I am working tomorrow. Today at The Booze Emporium, tomorrow at the legion. So it is a given that somewhere during the next two days someone will say or do something so stupid that the only sane reaction for me is to smash my head against a wall. That will re-open the crack and chase the demons away at the same time. They don't like turbulence.
All I have to do is get through today, get through tomorrow.  08/15 will mark the dawn of a new day. The light will get in once again and inspiration will spirit me away to that magical place where my soul dwells.
Until then................

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