Something To Shoot For

I am getting viciously attacked and beaten on all sides by harsh truths.

Life truths.

When I visit Chiro Man, the first minute is spent engaged in conversation. The obligatory ice breaking joke, then a quick analysis on where I am at and how I am feeling.

Thursday he changed things up on me with this opening line: "I want to talk about your family history."

I had to fill out reams of paperwork when I first started with the guy, just as I have had to do over and over again throughout this fascinating process.

The paperwork included a family history.

We talked about my mother's life long struggle with heart problems and her unfair and undeserved, premature death at the young age of 69.

We talked about the way my father died and the brain trauma he experienced.

Then he asked about my health issues. I rattled off the list (and believe me it pisses me off royally that I have a list) - high blood pressure, high cholesterol, asthma.

He began to make his point by saying "You are at the age"........................

This immediately got my attention. Because I am well aware of the age I am at. Because right now I am hating it.

Previously I would have envisioned myself as a hale and hearty sixty year old. Now I feel weak and vulnerable.

He made the point that I am at a vulnerable age and that I am also at an age where I can still do something about it.

With lifestyle changes.

He said "I have people in their seventies and beyond who come in here that are still vigorous."

This got my attention too because 70 is my new fear. The decade between 50 and 60 went by lightening quick and I am not happy to be here. 60 sounds old. 70 sounds even more finite.

This is the fourth time in three months that I have endured this lecture.

The first time it came from Dr. Feelgood, but it did not have as much impact because she did it in anger and was reacting to my audacity at even questioning her.

The second time it came from the first therapist I dealt with. He was cool and we talked well.

The third time it came from my optometrist, who has a holistic approach to life that I respect.

And now, Chiro Man.

None of them lied to me.

I know exactly where I sit and I know what I have to do. I have begun. Whiskey is an afterthought and exercise is back in my life. However I still have a very long way to go in the dietary arena.

I need more discipline there and I do not expect to fail.

My point is, it is quite sobering to have a number of people tell me, in effect, that if I do not change my wicked ways, I will die prematurely.

As if I don't think about death enough as it is.

I have always had a sense of invincibility in the back of my mind. I knew I wasn't taking the best care of my health, but I believed that what I was doing in conjunction with my iron constitution would get me through to my 113th birthday.

I no longer believe that.

Lemmy Kilmister is the front man for the group known as Motorhead, who still tour and still record.  This guy was legendary for living the rock 'n roll lifestyle long after the rest of his generation began sipping water on stage, instead of Budweiser.

He lived in the back of a bar or up above a bar or next to a bar. Something like that. A bar known for live music and Lemmy.

He drank Jack & Coke around the clock and smoked two packs of Marlboro Reds a day. He did not strike me as the kind of guy who could change his lifestyle.

I liked that about him.

Last year Lemmy had heart trouble.

He said: "There is nothing weirder than having everything you are taken from you in one day - bingo."

He now drinks diet coke and rides an exercise bike.

He says: "Let's face it - it isn't as much fun. But it can't be as much fun if I die. I don't believe that's much fun either."

Reflecting back on his partying days he said: "I suddenly realized I was waking up in pool's of other people's vomit, and I had no recollection of them. That's a bit much. I'm not saying don't have fun, don't snort the occasional line - but don't make it your life."

Lemmy Kilmister is 67.

That's a fifth voice in my head telling me what I already know. And I am lucky enough so far to have not experienced any major health eruptions.

I will never be a choir boy. That just ain't me.

But I wouldn't mind being a witty and healthy 80 year old, dancing with my deeply loved 80 year old wife, and enjoying the company of my 53 year old and 50 year old sons.

Enough, already.

I get the point.