Today is my brother's birthday.
He is 61.
I called him and inevitably the conversation drifted into this aging thing.
It sneaks up on you and suddenly becomes a concern, even though it has taken many decades to get you there.
We agreed that 60 seems to be the line of demarcation.
Ed said that 30 didn't bother him and 50 didn't bother him, but 60 did.
I took a more stressful path towards getting there - at 30 I started thinking about dying. At 48, believe it or not, I freaked out because 50 was looming in my future.
50 didn't overwhelm me but the fact that the 10 years between 50 and 60 went by in a heartbeat, did.
At 50 you can kid yourself that you are still youngish. Sixty just sounds older, especially knowing that when the next 10 years fly by you will be 70.
Heavy duty, baby.
We are both young at heart; most people do not guess us to be as old as we are. That is a good thing and it means nothing.
What matters is what is in your head. And your head knows that the years you have left to you are seriously numbered and frighteningly small in quantity compared to the years you have lived.
There is no getting around it no matter how healthy you are or how positive your attitude.
The cliche is true - life moves at faster miles an hour and the older you get the faster it moves.
You can dig your heels in and all you get is bloody heels.
It is such a strange phenomena; even though it takes 60 years to get to sixty, once you are there it feels like 10 seconds. And your mind just cannot grasp the reality of where you are in life.
Ed and I are lucky. Neither of us has had a major health concern to date.
But we are walking through the mine field. I feel like bombs are dropping all around me and somehow, someway, I have not been touched.
So many friends have had major health problems; so many relatives have died.
You gotta keep punching. You gotta re-wire your mind or learn to ignore it.
Worry and anxiety are a waste of time. It would be a crime against humanity to sacrifice your remaining years to fear of mortality.
Ed is 61. I am 62.
We got a lot to offer and a lot to accomplish.
No sense in giving up now.