No Better

Feeling emotional today.

Been happening a lot lately.

And you say: "Wait a minute, Joe - what the fuck are you talking about? You are always emotional. It's a goddamn miracle you can still produce tears."

True. Guilty as charged. I am emotional and I do not apologize for that. Emotions are what life is all about, baby. If you feel nothing you might as well be dead.

Warren Zevon: "Going to hurl myself against the wall 'cause I'd rather feel bad than feel nothing at all."

The kind of emotional I am feeling today is a positive vibe. I went in to facebook to trash Trump and I could not do it. Could not summon up the requisite negativity.

Because I feel good. The euphoria that materialized on Tuesday afternoon has taken root. I have been bouncing on the balls of my feet, floating, feeling light.

Luck jumped on my wave and is riding with me. Carol is an NPR devotee. She supports the station financially. In the current fund drive she was rewarded with Lyle Lovett tickets.

Free. We are going to see Lyle Lovett tonight for free.

What an amazing gift. Getting a chance to see a unique talent on a Saturday night, baby. Music; of course dinner before the show; me and my baby going out on a date, a very special date - four days after having my nose sliced up.

Four days after finding out that the most difficult period of my life is over. That I got me a wake up call and a chance to do something about it.

Know what I am going to do about it?

Dig stuff.

Wide eyed and open minded.

Treating ourselves to dinner tonight and the conversation we always share about our life together.

Comfortably. Lovingly.

Being the beneficiaries of free tickets to a musical experience that is bound to satisfy our souls. Lift us up and make our life better.

Strange coincidence: On Thursday I was at work rooting through CD's to play and found a Lyle Lovett CD. I am not familiar with a lot of his music but what I have heard before I liked.

I fell in love with the damn thing. Took it home to slap on to my ipod. Coincidentally, that night Carol told me she might have a shot at Lyle Lovett tickets. What? Friday, as I pulled into my parking spot at work she texted me - she got the tickets.

You might not want to believe that my positive vibe, my emotional state of being after being released from a solid month of stress, had anything to do with winning those tickets, with discovering the beauty that is Lyle Lovett.

I don't give a damn what you think. In fact I no longer give a damn about what most people think if it conflicts with my own beliefs.

Bob Dylan: "I used to care but, things have changed." I am considering making that my mantra and the song, "Things Have Changed", my theme song.

Something is going on here, something positive and I am going to ride it until it bucks me off.

If it bucks me off.

I am a lucky man. I have a weekend. I am going out to dinner with Carol; we are going out to a magical, musical, performance.

I am alive and kicking.

I have hope.

It doesn't get any better than that.