Prostate Cancer (Don't You Know)

Crawling up towards the finish line.

Final hormone shot tomorrow. Ending a two year escapade.

An escapade that began with 44 radiation treatments early in 2021. And then two years worth of hormone shots - one shot every three months. 

Turning me into a woman. My voice is higher than Al Kaprielian's when predicting a high presssure area.

Not really. Hormone treatments have turned me into the Pillsbury Dough Boy - soft, fleshy, fat, and misshapen. I feel weak, I feel tired, but I'm not dead. 

People tell me that's a good thing.

In reality the whole ordeal went pretty easy on me. The Captain of Radiology told me repeatedly that I tolerated it well. No real side effects. Same thing with hormone shots. No radical side effects beyond the fact I don't recognize myself in the mirror.

I saw worse. People shuffling in for radiation treatments, hunched over, some even in obvious pain. People my age who looked 15 years older. People shuffling out - slowly - hanging on to their escort.

I was reminded of it again last week. I had to meet with the Captain of Radiology last week for no discernible reason. I wrapped up radiation in April or June of 2021. He asked me how I was doing, told me I handled the whole thing well, and reminded me that I will see him again three months after tomorow's shot.

?

While I was there I saw people shuffling in, shuffling out, hunched over, arm in arm with their escort. Not pretty. Life graphically illustrated.

Before every hormone shot I have blood work done to confirm that I am still a woman. Apparently, before the Final Shot, they really want to test shit. Normally they take two vials of blood. Period. They don't require a urine sample.

Yesterday they took four vials of blood and had me contribute urine to the process.

The beautiful thing about aging is I can provide a urine sample whenever they need one. Any time of day or night, whether I have just gone to the bathroom or not. Urine is in endless supply when you get old. Thankfully there are some benefits to decrepitude.

Tomorrow Dr. Feelgood will tell me  testosterone is negligible, the PSA level is negligible, this and that and this and that. I have heard it every three months for two years. All good news.

He'll tell me we'll check you out again in three months after your body has had a chance to return to "normal."

That checkup is the key. If the PSA count skyrockets I may be a dead man walking. If it is low it means these last two years of treatments were not wasted.

I am rooting for the latter.