At Some Point

I drive a 2020 Hyundai Elantra.

Bought it brand new. The car has no balls, it is not stylish, it has few creature comforts. I should be driving a Lincoln, but I have convinced myself that the fact that I don't have to grimace in fear every time I start the Elantra is "good enough." There is something to be said about the peace of mind a new car brings.

Even if the affluent belly-laugh as I slowly motor on by.

The Hyundai is currently in the shop with a smashed windshield and dented roof. I have a rental. A 2020 Acura MDX. It is described as a mid-size luxury crossover SUV.

It's pretty fucking nice.

I did not go seeking it. I would have taken anything that was available. I tried to set shit up in advance, but through a comedy of errors and inefficiency by the rental company, I ended up with this car.

Much more car than I need. It makes me feel like a man again.

I love driving it.

At some point this week I will have to return it and climb back into the Hyundai.

How's that gonna go?

I will probably hate my car for a while, until I eventually settle back into my assigned role as Poverty Boy, and once again accept my lot in life.

Although I have been daydreaming about driving the Acura to Arizona. It would accomodate me quite comfortably on a cross-country jaunt, maybe even turn a few heads along the way.

I could cross the border into Arizona, just to say I've been there, then immediately turn around and head back to NH. Turn in the Acura, pick up the Hyundai, and go to work in my low-level and humiliating customer service job.

I am sure the satisfaction of the trip will give me the perspective to enjoy the rest of my life.

Wait, what the fuck am I saying? 

No fucking way, Jose.

And my horizons have become even smaller.