26

Do you realize today is January 26th?

2023 is practically over. And what have you done?

Creeps up on you, doesn't it? Because you slip back into the routine, and the routine is numbing. The routine robs you of think. The routine numbs you for your entire adult life right up until you find yourself leaning precariously over the grave. Then you fucking wake up - wide-eyed and terrified.

You vow to finally do something with your life, you pray for a reprieve, but the Grim Reaper reaches out his boney little hand, drags you into the grave and says, with a sinister, all-knowing smile: "Too late, motherfucker." Christ, he smells bad.

You got drunk on New Year's Eve. You had a hell of a good time. You did not have to work on New Year's Day, so you nursed a hangover with more booze and two Big Macs, and vowed that this year would be different. 2023 was going to be the year you grabbed your life by the balls and squeezed with all your might until life cried uncle. Or, as Led Zep kind of put it - until the juice runs down your leg, but that's a discussion for another day and time. Besides, it was a lemon.

You went back to work. You were horrified, your mind rebelled. A day later the numbness set in. And now it's Janaury 26. Holy fucking shit. Can you believe it?

What will you be getting me for Valentine's Day?