The Relevance of Deer

Carol and I have adopted a spiritual relationship with deer over the years.

It began shortly after Carol's mother Dolly died. It involved a dream and a message and a spiritual sign.

I won't tell you about it because you might mock the circumstances, and then I would have to hunt you down and discipline you severely.

It meant a lot to us and that is all that matters.

When we first moved to the barren outpost called Henniker, we used to see deer all the time.

It was pretty magical. We were in a new home, a new place in life, our sons were six and three years old, and we were surrounded by these graceful, peaceful, beautiful creatures.

Over the years we have seen less and less of them to the point where we rarely see them.

It is a disappointment.

Recently the sightings have increased.

A lot.

Shortly after Kevin died I saw two deer hanging around the edges of our yard. Made me think of Kevin and Sarge. Peaceful together. Sending me the message that they are all right.

I have seen lone deer by the side of the road and though about Jonathan. Saw one just the other night, grazing close to the side of the road and facing me.

Felt like we were looking into each other's eyes.

Over the last couple of weeks we have sighted six or seven deer at once roaming around our yard and that of our neighbors. This has happened more than once.

In fact it happened twice this week, including last night.

Carol zapped up to our bedroom, threw open the glass sliders and took a bunch of pictures.

It doesn't matter what significance we place on these occurrences, it doesn't matter what you think about what we feel.

What matters is that seeing these magical creatures gives us a sense of peace. A calm. A temporary release from deadlines and commitments and pain and loss into a gentler world of nature and beauty and innocence.

If we connect these emotions and thoughts to the lives and memories of Sarge and Kevin and Jonathan, can you really criticize us?

These deer are giving us a precious gift of peace and calm while acknowledging the deaths of three people we love.

No way to exaggerate the benefit of that.