Been listening to conservative talk radio lately, purely for the entertainment. It happened by accident; it's the same station that broadcasts the Red Sox and sometimes the Bruins and they also do sports talk stuff; the rest of the time it's this conservative pudding.
First of all, half the guys on the station call themselves SomethingDog; there's Bulldog, a conservative talk dude, and J-Dog who is on the Bob Lobel show. You want to talk about pathetic, you should check out Lobel's show. Long periods of dead air, absolutely no enthusiasm and NOTHING exciting or inspiring. I think he had a lobotomy. Bob Lobotomy. Makes me think I could have a radio show - Wacky Joe's Insane Ramblings and Rants. Based on Lobel's example, I would only have to fill eighteen minutes of air time out of a one hour show. The rest would be consumed by commercials and dead air.
If you are going to be SomethingDog, you should be tough. A guy who physically inspires fear; a guy with a gravelly voice. These guys sound like they should work in ladies' lingerie. A name doesn't make you, you make a name. Dale Earnhardt was known as The Intimidator - perfect. Kyle Bush has been nicknamed Wild Thing by racing analysts. That's like naming your new-born, Killer. You have to earn a nickname, otherwise you are a fraud.
Anyway.....................I had my eyes opened a little the other day. Some dude was on defending Herman Cain's 9-9-9- plan and it made sense, sounded perfectly logical. I wondered what was wrong with me. That night it was discussed on MSNBC and I realized how dangerous it is, how unjust. Now I am reasonably intelligent - I have a sixth grade education, and someday I plan on being either a fry cook or a brain surgeon. And I got fooled. This is the danger of being uninformed - you are easily manipulated. This is what conservatives count on. Unfortunately, with the average intelligence level in this country below that of your common garden slug, the voting populace are easily manipulated, especially since many of them would believe anything to defeat that black guy in the white house.
I get additional exposure to conservative candidates on right wing radio. Rick Perry was interviewed last week for about a minute and a half. He had been running late and the show was almost over so they squeezed in what they could. It was a tease, kind of like losing your electricity in the middle of a Three Stooges episode, but I was at least briefly amused. Perry managed to squeeze in a slam on the EPA and it's devotees. He said he wouldn't dismantle it, just revamp it so environmentalists couldn't use it for their own jobs-killing objectives.
That was beautiful. republicans know people are desperate for employment so they throw the phrase jobs-killing into any nook and cranny, any situation. A cousin of Beavis and Butthead hears that phrase and gets crazy. "Goddamn environmentalists are killing jobs." If you ask what an environmentalist is, they would probably say "I don't know; maybe somebody who plays a violin? But if I catch one killing a job, there's going to be a beatdown."
I get a kick out of the regular callers whose entire life is defined by their celebrity on these tiny talk shows. "Who is this? Bobby John. Hey Bobby John, how are you doing today? Well not so good. I found a couple of trash bags on my lawn, somebody must of put them there." A few seconds of silence as the host was expecting Bobby John to make a point. The host feels obligated to Bobby John because he calls every damn day, so he picks up the conversation and makes two trash bags on a lawn sound like mass murder. Bobby John is satisfied, so he gets back to his bag of Funyuns and another scintillating episode of Days of Our Lives.
Why is it that most of the callers on conservative radio sound like they are unemployed? And education averse?
I get a kick out of listening to this dribble; the hosts are so unprofessional and the callers are usually a brick shy of a load. The station confirms the wisdom of my support for liberal, and sometimes radical views. It also makes me feel good that I at least try to do a little research on the things that interest me or piss me off.
Ultimately, they make me laugh, which I guess is good, even if it is at the expense of people with small minds.
I won't be laughing if President Obama gets defeated, though. If that happens every talk show in the country will be run by conservatives. Maybe I'll jump on the bandwagon.
My show's promo - "Check out JoeDog - he hates blacks, social security, the middle class, unions, democracy, gun control, the elderly and the poor. JoeDog - just your average fun-loving american."
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