Hooaa, been a bit wibbly and a bit wobbly in here since I got back from vacation.
Nothing of any substance. No passion.
When I write without passion I feel empty. My best comes from joy and anger and frustration and resentment and rage - my best comes from being alive.
The vacation really slapped me around. It was so pure and unexpected that it purged my soul of all bile. And believe me there was plenty of bile to go around.
It was a dangerous vacation. We could have ended up divorced. All that time alone together.
Instead it reaffirmed the beauty of committing an entire life to another human being. Thirty seven years married ain't nuthin' to sneeze at jack.
There were times when we sat side by side on the porch, overlooking and listening to the ocean, with Carol crocheting and me reading. In joyful silence.
People who know us are saying ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh, perfect.
Brief aside: The reading thing was new for me and what a sweet release it was. I can't read when others are around because we are busy socializing. Sipping on cocktails, speechifying over football and politics and life. I read for hours this year, on the porch and on the beach. This is how I would like to spend the rest of my life. With a book in my hand and my toes in the sand.
Anyway...........................Carol and I enjoyed each other's company in comfort and ease.
The vacation was such a release that I have had trouble bouncing back from it. But I think I am coming back around.
We went to the movies last night. Saw "Grandma" with Lily Tomlin and Sam Elliot. At Red River Theatres. A sensitive and quirky life movie enjoyed in our favorite theater. Awesome.
Red River is ours. Two screens and a smaller, projection-like screen for documentaries. That's it.
No 25 screen cinoplex bullshit. Very intimate. They serve beer and wine which makes it more mature. The typical audience is around our age too, which is great. I got nothing against you kids but the feeling of camaraderie we get there enhances the experience.
As we were walking out I heard a couple talking: "Wow, Lily Tomlin is on a roll. 'Grace and Frankie', now this movie." You don't get the reference and you have never heard of this movie.
I like that. It makes it ours.
So I am staring down an actual weekend. Two whole days. Pretty cool.
There is a poster in the men's room of Red River. Got a picture of James Dean. The quote says: "Dream like you'll live forever, live like you'll die tomorrow."
Why don't you give that a shot?