Saturday, August 17, 2013

Music & Vulnerability

Pumping my way to work this morning, John Mellencamp's "No Better Than This" serenading me and I am all smiles and tears.

I have been really down this week.

How can you laugh when you know I'm down?

I get a kind of down that is cellular. It affects my whole body. Could be a way of coping. I get quiet and there is no resistance in my body. I am giving myself over to whatever will be. No fight.

At times like that I notice the music doesn't just surround and involve me, the music is me. It gets into my bloodstream and manipulates and empathizes with my emotions.

I sing through some tears, I sing through some smiles.

That might be the best time to listen to music. When you are vulnerable, whether you are happy vulnerable or sad vulnerable.

You go to a concert and you are so psyched that your vibe alters the orbital course of the earth. You file into the venue, the music starts and you get taken to an even higher place. The music recognizes your joy, syncs up with it, and blasts you into happiness.

Or

You are really down, you dial up some music on the iPod, and the music gently caresses your nerve endings and flows carefully through your brain, negotiating dangerous terrain expertly, giving intense expression to whatever it is you are feeling.

Maybe when we are negotiating life anesthetized as we must be to survive, the music can't really get in, it can't do its work, it cannot connect with what is precisely and achingly human in us.

Intense emotion, happy or sad, vibrates at the same frequency of the music that we love, allowing a connection that reveals the true nature of music.

Music is created for your heart, it is created for your soul, it is created to expand your vision of life and what it can be so that you become aware that life is pure magic, pure emotion and pure love.

Gotta work again tomorrow. Day 7, of 9 consecutive at Lompoc. Sunday. I fucking hate working Sundays.

Got The Peace Mobile to ease my way down the road and back.

Got a CD player and the spirit of music to move my head around.

I'm just going to go with it. See how my molecules get rearranged.

It's going to do me some good.

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