My Emotions

I am devastated by the announcement of The Allman Brothers break up.

Earlier this year I found out that Derek and Warren would be leaving the band at the end of the year, and that the band would stop touring at the end of the year.

That was devastating enough.

The way I found out says a lot about Allman Brothers fans. We were out to dinner with Jason and Karen. I was wearing my Allman Brothers sweatshirt with their name boldly emblazoned across the back. We were sitting at the bar.

A complete stranger, a fan, came up to me and asked if I had heard about Derek and Warren. I had not. She told me and I was blown away.

Jason thought it odd that a stranger would initiate a conversation like that out of the blue. And I understand where he is coming from.

Except that I am a life long Allman Brothers fan. I am part of a family and so is she. Although we may never have been at the same concert, we share the experience of love and appreciation for a band that is larger than life. ABB fans are devoted, and they are also respectful and appreciative of each other.

The parking lot before a concert is comfortable. It feels like home. I have had countless conversations with hundreds of people of all ages over the years, conversations about songs, band members, band history, other concerts. Always comfortable. Always fun. Respectful in awe, easy in laughter.

Doesn't matter what the gaps are between us; if you are an Allman Brothers fan, you are good people.

I will miss that deeply.

Anyway, the news about Derek and Warren devastated me. Later on Gregg announced the band would stop touring at the end of 2014.

More devastation.

But I hung my hat on the last concert or concerts I would experience this year. Hounded the internet religiously looking for dates because I was going to get front row seats for the first time in my life.

Not to be.

I am crushed.

If I see the band at all this year it is going to take something extraordinary. Something that will break up my marriage, given our low bank balance resulting from Carol's lustful addiction to high priced jewelry and cocaine.

Obviously at this point everything is sold out.

So I am lost. I feel empty. I was thinking about it as I drove home last night, trying to work this reality into my brain. Put it into perspective. The thought occurred to me that this must have been how Carol felt when Elvis died.

Coincidentally, as we talked about the situation last night Carol said: "Now you know how I felt when Elvis died."

Amazing.

I am literally heart broken. I cannot lie. The Allman Brothers concert or concerts were going to be the highlight of this Summer of Magic that I am weaving. My summer plans are moving along deliciously but the concerts have been snatched away from me.

Summer without an Allman Brothers concert is like summer without heat. I know. There have been a few rare summers since 1989 when I didn't see them and my soul was empty.

I do, however, have many amazing memories. And some not-memories. There are a few concerts I must confess that are only a blur in my diseased brain.

All in all, Allman Brothers concerts have enriched me and lifted me to heights of pleasure and happiness that no other band has ever done.

I have that in my heart and in my soul.

Much like my family, The Allman Brothers Band has made my life a better thing.

That is magic.

Magic that I will miss, I will mourn and that I will treasure for the rest of my life.