Thank God

Music is limitless and thank Christ for that.

It is limitless, and sometimes you come across beauty in so random a way that you wonder how much beauty is missing from your life.

Get home last night and Carol was jazzed up about Mary Gauthier - a singer/songwriter she heard being interviewed/played on NPR. Carol was listening in The Peace Mobile on the way home from her private hell - work - and was so inspired that she raced into the house and dialed up NPR on this ancient boombox - a big, ugly thing we got sitting on top of the hope chest - and listened to the rest of the music and words.

Other than last night, the only other way this boombox gets used is as a stepping stool for the cats to the windows.

When I got home she reached her legs out and tripped me as I staggered by, jumped on my chest, got in my face and said: "You got to listen to Mary Gauthier, you grumpy, old bastard. You will love her."

It was a strange greeting after a day at The Asylum but it certainly got my attention.

And she was right.

Just dialed up You Tube and listened to "I Drink" and "Drag Queens And Limousines", and got knocked down again.

By beauty. Deep, heart felt emotion.

I sat here stunned by the depth of the lyrics, the simple power of the music. The life experience in her eyes and the amused knowledge in her body language there that we all gotta make our own mistakes and learn in our own way.

How did I get all that from a couple of  You Tube videos?

I am more amazing than you might think.

So now this woman is a part of our life. I will buy her music and allow it to lessen the fire in my nerves. Carol will listen and realize that it makes more sense to listen to Mary Gauthier than to listen to any of the insane, unfocused and rambling words that come out of my mouth.

Win win.

Which got me thinking about owning music. I can buy Mary Gauthier's CD's and you can buy Mary Gauthier's CD's and we won't be buying the same music.

Her music will mean something different to you than it means to me, depending on where we both are in our lives, past experiences, future plans, wavering dreams.

But it will be beautiful to both of us. It will take us away from the muck, the everyday bullshit, the flow of meaningless that sweeps us away every morning. And transport us to truth.

Truth of emotion, truth of life, truth of struggle, commonality of the fight. The fight to survive, the fight to express individuality fiercely.

Dig this lyric from "Drag Queens And Limousines": "Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do, and hope that the people you love will catch up with you."

BOOM.

Thank God for Mary Gauthier, thank God for Carol's sensitivity, thank God she always knows what I will dig.

Thank God for the limitlessness of music.