The Next Thought

I am handcuffed by my inability to have the next thought.

I have talked to friends who play guitar; I ask them when they started playing. Many say "Right after I first saw The Beatles on TV. I went out as soon as I could afford one and bought the cheapest guitar I could find."

The next thought. They made a connection. They thought "I can do that too."

Not me.

Many of those people, most of those people, just ended up playing guitar and not becoming rock stars. But is that such a bad thing? The inspiration brought something into their lives that gives them beauty and peace and a sense of accomplishment.

I have read the words of so many people who, at some point in their lives, thought "This is what I want to do with my life." After seeing someone, hearing someone, meeting someone - they all had a moment in their lives that inspired them to pursue a specific course.

The most important thing you can do with your life is to pursue a specific course. It gives your life meaning, it leads you on to other things that fulfill you. Wandering aimlessly is the worst thing you can do with your life.

Because life is not a passive bystander; life has fangs and your neck is vulnerable.

I never had the next thought. But my proximity to death is leading me in that direction. I am trying to find a way.

I can write. That's it. 

I am trying to lay groundwork to make money as a copywriter, as a starting point. I fucked up the first time. I didn't read any of the many things that were provided for me to help me understand how copywriting works. I just jumped right in because "I am a writer" - I can write anything.

I was humbled.

Round 2 - I am working my way through all the guidance and hints provided by another copywriting website. I submitted a test submission yesterday. I will see where this leads.

This is a short term goal, if a 68 year old man can even have a short term goal. To make some money from copywriting. More satisfying plans include publishing my blog in segments and earning money from creative writing.

The thought is: I am a writer. The next thought is: I can use my ability to save my life.

That's it. Pretty simple. But daunting.

I got nothing to lose, baby.