Santa's got a headache
He's drinking way too much
Christmas is approaching
And whiskey is his crutch
Mrs.Claus is worried
Drunken Santa in his sleigh
Might get lost on Christmas Eve
He might just lose his way
But Rudolph is the bomb, man
He knows just what to do
They'll get it done with time to spare
They'll get your gifts to you
So screw the milk and cookies
Give Santa what he needs
A glass of top shelf whiskey
And maybe a little weed
Next year in December
You'll amaze at what you get
A Cadillac for Christmas
Santa doesn't forget
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