Fauxhawk?

Did you see Tom Brady's hair? Tommy, my man, what the hell are you doing? He looked best when he wore his hair long. I felt the same about Johnny Damon. But then again, I am long hair prejudiced.
Brady keeps me off  balance. I love the man. He brought me three Super Bowls. Me personally.
He is a wicked competitor and his teammates, coaches and opponents all respect him. He is an awesome quarterback.
But wearing your hair like that is superficial. My only hope is that he did it as a joke to provoke a reaction. It looks ridiculous and he knows it. If he was lead guitar in a punk band I would authorize the look.
But the man travels in rarefied circles. The money. The celebs. The wifey. The clothes. The events.
Come on, man.
He is not the greatest speaker. Definitely not dynamic. When I hear him talk, it feels to me like he is right on the razor's edge of coming across like a dumb jock. But not quite.
I see him with the wifey and I get the impression she might be in control. Which I definitely do not want to believe. Do you really think the hair was his idea? Can you imagine the reaction of his teammates?
When I see him at social events and on the cover of a magazine holding a goat, I get the impression he might like the limelight in an artsy, left of center, elitist kind of way.
I don't want to believe this.
So he keeps me off balance.
Kind of comes across as a hard working, down to earth, competitively tough football dude. Kind of.
Kind of comes across as a media darling, well spoken and witty. Kind of.
Kind of comes across as a guy who swept a super model off her feet. Kind of.
Kind of comes across as guy who would not be dazzled by the glitterati. Kind of.
Kind of comes across as a guy who knows exactly who he is. Kind of.
You keep me guessing, Mr. Brady.
Do me a favor. Bring me another Super Bowl. I need it. I hunger for it. Make up for the goddamn giants and wimpy Eli.
Even better - destroy them in a third match up. 85 to 3.
You'll have plenty of time to play strange hair celeb after you retire.
Maybe you can rock the Professor Irwin Corey look next.