Fuckatology

A scientific discipline that studies mankind's obsession with self-sabotage.

We live our lives as if we are immortal. Wasting day after day after day, trading off five days for two every week, and then pissing those two days away as well.

Hurting ourselves. You don't need a knife to self-mutilate.

Hurting others. It's almost a sport.

Being petty. No fucking perspective.

Chasing security instead of happiness, even though each fucking breath could be your last. Security? Are you fucking kidding me?

I was feeling unstable and unnerved. Barely functioning. I went to consult with a specialist.

I laid out my life history for him, six decades plus. And asked "Why am I so unhappy, doc? Why do I have nothing to show? Where is all my money?"

He replied "Fuckatology, son. You are fucking yourself. You've been doing it for so long that you got it down to a science. Don't even have to think about it. You will always make the worst decision. Or no decision at all."

I said "Jesus Christ, what can I do about this? What should I do?"

He said "Nothing. Forget about it, son. You are a fuckup. Soon you will be dead. Just die and get it over with. And your suffering and embarrassment will end. Another wasted human life. One of billions. There are solutions, but you are too stupid to figure it out."

I said "Jesus Christ, that's pretty fucking harsh, isn't it?"

He said "Fuckatology. It's harsh, baby, because it's the truth."