I Always Wanted To Be Alone

When I was a kid I liked to play Little Army in my backyard.

I would set up my plastic army guys in the grass and go to war.

In the meantime my brother and the neighborhood kids would be gathering to play Birdie Ball - a sport we invented. Used a birdie instead of a wiffle ball and a tennis racket instead of a bat. We should have patented the fucking game - I would be retired now.

They wanted me to join them. I would say "If you carry me over to the driveway, I will play."

And they would. I don't know why. They should have just spit on me.

When I was a kid my favorite game in the world was a board football game. Pick a play - run or pass - roll the dice and see how many yards you get. Or if you fumble or get intercepted. You could punt and kick field goals too. Move a marker up and down to track field position.

I used to keep win/loss records. I played various teams, but for some reason the dominant teams were the Chargers and either the Raiders or the Chiefs. I think the Chiefs. Those were the teams I played the most, and the teams I was excited about. I don't know why.

I could play the game alone. Which I did. Endlessly. Did not need anybody else. Defintely logged hundreds of alone hours playing this game, maybe thousands. I played it a lot. I loved it.

I always wanted to be alone as a kid.

Other than my family, I should have stuck to my guns.