The Leaf

Lying in bed this morning looking through the glass sliders at trees in the yard.

A lone, dead, leaf caught my eye because it was twisting in the wind on a branch. Looked like it was barely hanging on. There were four or five dead leaves closeby, but they were barely rustling in the wind, a gentle wind. But this guy was dancing.

For some reason this leaf was twisting like mad, like it really wanted to drop off that branch. Or hold on; I wasn't sure how to interpret it.

It would shimmy, shimmy shake for a bit, than get quiet. Until it began twisting again. Violently.

I was mesmerized. I really wanted to see this leaf float to the ground, but I don't know why. I don't know if I needed to see the ultimate confirmation of it's death, or celebrate it's escape from the tree and it's dead mates.

All I know is that I was really emotionally caught up in this drama. Kind of like Ricky Fitts with the floating plastic bag.

I hung for about 10 minutes. Then I moved to the bathroom, where I had an even better view. As I performed my morning ablutions, I kept an eye out. Brush my teeth, look out the window. Floss, look out the window.

When I completed my allotted tasks I stood by the window for 10 minutes and watched. Both cats were in the room with me saying "What the fuck are you waiting for?"

The leaf did not drop.

I popped into this room for a couple of minutes and got another angle.

Went downstairs to gobble pills, eat yogurt and make coffee (oh shit, here we go again, for Christ sake).

Made use of the downstairs bathroom, where I had yet another vantage point to monitor the leaf.

Nothing.

Gave up.

Just came back up here many hours later and the leaf is gone. It let go. It fell.

I so wanted to watch it float to the ground.

I have no explanation for why it got under my skin so much. But it did.

Sometimes something connects on an emotional level that has no rhyme, no reason.

It just is.

And that is reason enough.